3. Davy Jones – Pirates of the Caribbean

Bill Nighy as Davy Jones in Pirates of the Caribbean

In terms of his looks, Davy Jones is probably one of the most fearsome movie villains out there. His tentacled face and his penetrating gaze are unnerving enough, and that’s without even mentioning the colossal Kraken he’s got lurking below.

Suggestive comments about sea creatures aside, Davy Jones is also one of the dumbest movie villains of all time.

There are two major factors to Jones’ stupidity. The first stems from a moment in which Jones is called to parlay on land, despite the fact that he’s cursed to only be able to walk on land once every 10 years. In a brief visual gag, Jones can be seen standing in buckets of seawater, fixing any potential plot hole. However, in the process, it seems that there’s a major loophole in Jones’ curse that he could be regularly exploiting, and for some reason he just… doesn’t.

There’s also the matter of the Kraken, which is shown to be able to swallow a ship in a fraction of a second. However, instead of setting it upon Jack Sparrow at the first sign of trouble, Jones allows Jack to continue scurrying around the Caribbean, only eventually deciding to use the beast to his advantage (it fails anyway, but that’s hardly the point).

Basically, Davy Jones may have been cursed with immortality, but he didn’t use all that extra time to make himself any smarter.