1. Cutting the Cord – Shoot ‘Em Up

Shoot ‘Em Up is a uniquely insane piece of film from the moment it begins. In fact, the very first scene is exactly the one we’re looking at here, when Mr. Smith (Clive Owen) steps in to protect a heavily pregnant woman from a would-be murderer.

After a punching a carrot through the man’s skull (yes, really), Smith and the woman then encounter several waves of gunmen, all of which Smith holds off in true action movie style.

The kicker? The woman is giving birth throughout the scene, and Smith is both racking up an impressive body count and delivering her baby at the same time. As if all that isn’t weird enough, Smith then turns his gun on the newborn, and uses a bullet to cut the umbilical cord.

For added context: at this point, the only real thing we know about either character is that Smith hates middle-aged men with ponytails, which should go even further toward describing why this one tops the list.

And that’s the list. Leave your thoughts in the comments below, and stay tuned for more lists, news and reviews!