5. Forbidden Fruit – Pan’s Labyrinth
Here at Corner of Film, it’s beginning to look as though we make it a habit of pointing out just how stupid children can be. Now, obviously it’s one of life’s hard truths, but where movies are concerned, it’s pretty undeniable. Kids are almost always idiots, plain and simple.
Pan’s Labyrinth is a gorgeously dark fairy tale from the twisted mind of Guillermo del Toro. This means that monsters are very much real, and therefore, the danger that young Ofelia faces is equally real. This is something made very clear by the faun giving her tasks to complete – one of which is to retrieve a dagger from the Pale Man, a child-eating monster. Ofelia is expressly warned not to eat any of the food in the Pale Man’s lair. However, being a dumb kid, she ignores the warning and eats some grapes. Predictably, the horrifying monster wakes and chases Ofelia, who narrowly escapes his clutches only to come face to face with an angry faun.
Putting aside the fact that Ofelia was specifically warned not to eat the Pale Man’s food, her decision is still incredibly stupid. Knowing that you’re in a magical lair with a terrifying child-eating monster sat asleep in front of you, eating some of his food should have been the last thing on Ofelia’s mind. Staring at the clammy, eyeless, sleeping form of the Pale Man should be enough to kill anyone’s appetite, but Ofelia simply couldn’t resist eating two grapes – making her yet more evidence in support of the Corner of Film “kids are dumb” theory.